On Monday I had a very fun time at the Blackthorn Pub and Pizza in St. Louis, celebrating my 33rd birthday with my friends.

My friend Tracy got in on some of the Googly fun as well.

It must have been something in the beer that encouraged such googliness.

“My Googly, my Guinness!”

Elmhurst inspired me… to put googly eyes on their brochures.

“So, honey, what do you think of the new hot tub I built?”

“It’s okay.  I mean, it’s not really a hot tub.  I’d say more of a mild tub.

“Well the salsa might be mild, but having you in the tub makes it extra hot.”

“Oh please, did you spend all of one second coming up with that pickup line?  Are you a chip or a dip?”

Sure, the knife and the spoon were living it up now, but the dish knew that someday they’d be together.   Destiny, the stuff of fairy tales.

“Hey, Grid-Unit-10092OA, have you ever wondered what we’re all really doing here?”

“I know exactly why you’re here, Grid-Unit-10092OB, because if you weren’t I wouldn’t be able to support Grid-Unit-100091Z and he wouldn’t be able to support Grid-Unit-100091Y.”

“No, no… I mean, why are we all in this grid?  Did we grid units always arrange ourselves in grid-like patterns?   What purpose does it serve?”

“Attention Grid-Control-Unit-Alpha-Omega, we have a free-thought alert in section 10029. “

“What did you say, Grid-Unit-10092OA?  I didn’t quite catch that…”

“Oh nothing, Grid-Unit-10092OB, just calling over some people who might be able to stop- I mean, answer your questions.”

“Ooh!  Sounds fun!”

Recently a horrifying discovery was made in an hidden lamp laboratory in the artic: human-lamp hybrids.

The end result is a sickening mixture of man and illuminatory machine.  The true purpose of this monstrous experiment are just as unknown and mysterious as the lamps themselves.

Each lamp hybrid found soon died, proving that for now the lamp menace has failed in whatever sinister plan they had come up with the enslave humanity.  Stay vigilant, natural born citizens of Earth!

“Girls, listen up.  I have some terrible news…”

“I am sorry to report that attendance to our ballet show has grown so low we may have to disband the group.”

“What?”

“Merciful Heavens!  What will we do?  I don’t want to become a waitress again!”

“How did this happen?”

“Well, it seems not enough people are going out to live performances and are instead staying at home and watching TV and DVDs and Googling things…”

SUPPORT LOCAL LIVE PERFORMANCES AND SEE A SHOW THIS WEEK

NOTE:  Seriously.  Go out and see a live show.  I am certain there are plenty of wonderful live performances of all sorts of varieties in your area.  Turn off your TV and go see one.

– Googly Editor