Googly Eye Pictures

“Hey, c’mon people!  You don’t need to use those dumb ol’ modern metal monstrosities over there!  Ol’ Jake is comin’ outta retirement!  Who here wants an espresso, Victorian age style?”

This adorable little fellow came up to my table at MoKaBe’s in St. Louis, just begging for attention.

If I didn’t already have so many chairs at home I might have taken the little guy back with me.  I’m sure someone will find him a good home.

FOOD FOR ME? FOOD FOR ME!?!?

Aww…. It’s not food for me…

FOOD FOR ME!?   FOOD FOR ME!?!?!?

Awww…. Not food for me….

Attention human!  I am a robot!   Halt movement immediately!  Come close please!

Do you know the way to Sesame Street?  I am a robot.  I have a very important message for a large bird.

Why does every human laugh when I ask this question?  It is my one and only purpose programmed into me by my creators at BongHit University.  I must tell the large bird about the furry elephant’s location.  I am a robot.

“Honey, why is that unsavory character staring at us like that?  I think he’s coming closer”

“Oh, that Mr. Peterson.  I sold you to him last night.”

“What!?  Sold me!?  What on Earth are you talking about?”

“Yes dear, don’t worry I sold you for two whole dollars.  That’s twice as much as most apples sell for.”

“You did all this without consulting me first?  You idiot!  Did you even haggle at all?  I’m sure he would have paid at least four dollars if you had any spine!”

“Hey, buddy!  Forget the money, just take her now, PLEASE!”

“Here I am to save the day!  Who needs my help and assistance?  Hey, I’m a superhero!  Over here!  Why isn’t anyone paying any attention to me?”

“Nobody ever wants my help and assistance…”

“Wow, these are great seats, Sugar!  You can almost see the beads of sweat on all the players.”

“Ooh!  That looks like it hurt!   Hey, Honey!  Did you see that play?”

“It was a nice one, that is for sure.”

“Hello, my name is Cinnamon, and I am enjoying this game as much as-”

“Shut up, Cinnamon!   No one wants to talk to you.”

“Ohh… Okay…”

“Oh boy!  I’ve just come into the world and I am so excited and full of wonder!  What is my purpose in life?  Why am I here?  Oh, I can’t wait to find out!”

“Woah, hey!  This seems like something!  Maybe this is what I’m meant to do.  I… I feel kinda woozy.  I’m having… trouble seeing now… things are growing… dark…”

“…”

“Hi, everyone.  This is *sigh” Plant Talk with your host Ashely…”

“I supposed I should introduce our guest… but I don’t see what the point is.  He’ll just end up disappointing me like every other man whose walk onto the lonely, empty stage of my life.”

“What is wrong with me?  Why can’t I find a someone who isn’t crazy, a liar, or a cheat?  *sigh* Let’s go to commercial…”

“Hey, there, buddy!  Come to put some of your allowance in my money slot?  Alright!”

“Huh… that’s weird.  I don’t see any money in your hands.  You know that’s an awfully big hammer, you should be careful with that.”

“Y-you know, if I was more p-paranoid I might get the idea you might be trying to make a withdrawal… Umm.. Buddy?”      *CRASH*